I’m betting that saying “no” to someone isn’t on your list of favorite things to do. Mine either, but with practice and a little forethought this little two-letter wonder can work wonders in your own life.
In case you haven’t noticed, there are plenty of things in your life that you have to say “yes” to . . .work obligations, family obligations, household obligations. I’m betting you dole out yes’s like parade candy. In fact you probably give them away so often that when you encounter a no brainer no you say “yes” before you even know what hit you.
A no brainer no is saying “no” to something that the only reason you would think about saying yes is that you don’t want others to think poorly of you or talk bad about you to others. A no brainer no doesn’t affect your job, your closest relationships, or your health or safety.
Let me give you an example. An acquaintance asks you to go to a concert with her and a group of moms (or maybe it’s a group of co-workers). You really don’t care for the main act, and you’ve been so busy that adding the concert would produce a certain amount of dread and one more thing to do thoughts. But you’re worried that this person will be disappointed, so you consider saying yes.
This is where you stop, step back and see a few things clearly:
- In the big picture, it’s ok if this person is a little disappointed.
- Wouldn’t you rather say “yes” to yourself than to someone else?
- Think of how relieved you will feel once the “no” is over and done with.
If you take a step back, you can see this a no brainer no. To find the Extra in the Ordinary, we have to push ourselves to feel a little uncomfortable at times, but the payoff is big once you get used to saying “yes” to you. And a simple, “Thanks for the invitation, but I’m going to have to pass,” works wonders. The next time a “no brainer” no pops up, try it!
Extra-Ordinary Ideas:
Read It: Say yes to reading a great book this summer. I’m loving The Summer Guest by Justin Cronin. The Summer Guest
Do It: Ever thought about all of the gracious ways to say No? Be prepared with a few of your own ways to say no.
Think It: “When you say yes to everything, you say no to something really important, and most of the time it’s YOU.” -unknown source
Giveaway Winner for June: Gena from West Chester won a book and a t-shirt for this tip for helping kids keep fears at bay. Thanks Gena!
Yesterday, my daughter, Olivia approached me holding a bottle of Yankee liquid air freshener and asked me if this was the “Monster Spray”.
When she was little and scared to sleep by herself because of monsters, I would spray her room and under her bed. She truly believed it was a special concoction to get rid of monsters. The fake label glued to the front of the bottle sealed the deal when she questioned me the first time I used it.
Worked every time!
